I Like this Trend. Let's Keep Doing This.

So recently I keep dreaming about hot British men. No, that should probably be trademarked: Hot British Men TM. Definitely capitalized, at least. And no, not those kinds of dreams. Sheesh.

The first time, this guy showed up:

I saved him after a pirate captain made him walk the plank, by calling upon my selkie kinfolk. Yeah. I don't know either, but it was all kinds of entertaining. Pirates! Regency/Napoleonic war-era naval uniforms! Hiddleston in a wet shirt, fighting pirates!

The next time, it was this gentleman:

Which at least makes sense, since I've recently become converted/addicted to Doctor Who, and just finished watching all six seasons currently available on Netflix (thanks Netflix!). In this dream, Tennant (not the Doctor, it was David Tennant) was in the TARDIS, flying along traffic on either Rt. 7 in Virginia or Hwy 40 in Utah - probably both combined. He was very anxious to find something that had been lost, but I was unable to help. Abject failure on my part.

Then, a few nights later, this man made an appearance:

I met him at an estate-turned-bike shop located at the bottom of Provo Canyon, after I biked down the canyon to get there (so, obviously this is pure and total fiction). We had tea and a lovely chat. I woke to the thought that I really must start biking regularly so I can make it down the canyon to meet him for real (clearly, I was not remotely awake yet when thinking this).

All in all, I could get used to this trend. Carry on, Brain, carry on.

I Gave at the Office

Is anyone else as heartily sick of the whole vampire craze as I am?

No, seriously. I get the classics - Bram Stoker (though I have no personal desire to read Dracula) earned a place in literary history. That's cool. But the recent trend towards glamorizing the evil undead has just gotten really, really boring, particularly as it's been paired with teen romance (a genre that makes me personally want to hurl rocks). Don't even get me started on Twilight, I'm warning you.

(IMHO, the only vampire novel worth reading is Robin McKinley's Sunshine. Just sayin'.)

(Also, the whole MHI series by Larry Correia, in which vampires are their traditional nasty selves and get slain. A lot.)

But the straw that just broke my camel's back? Vampire, the fragrance. No, really. Click the link. There you go. I'll wait while you clean up the mess. I mean for crying out loud, what's it supposed to smell like, O-positive? I sincerely hope this is a joke, but there is no holding of breath going on here.

Can we all please agree that this trend has run its course and call it a day? Er, night?

White Wedding...or Not

I currently work at [Women's Clothing Retailer], and, this being spring, I'm starting to get lots of ladies coming in looking for dresses to wear at weddings; many of these women are mothers of the bride or groom. I am also noticing a disturbing trend: colorblind brides. At least I can only assume that is the cause behind such wedding color combinations as burnt orange and avocado green. (Really???)

Girls. Brides. Ladies. Let's talk. I don't care what current fashion trends are, what the bridal magazines say, or who is telling you that trendy color combo is a good idea. Red/black/white looks stunning, yes, but think about it for a minute. Forest green and sky blue? Nothing wrong with the colors individually, of course. Burnt orange and avocado green - for real? Are you wearing camo? Going hunting? More importantly, think about these color combinations and ask yourselves:

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IT IS FOR YOUR POOR MOTHER/BRIDESMAIDS/ANYONE TO FIND A DRESS TO MATCH YOUR WEDDING COLORS???? Do you realize the kind of pain you're putting these women through? These are women who care about you! Putting them through this is simply no way to treat them!

And consider when you look back on your wedding photos in 10, 20 or 30 years - the sheer, dated trendiness of it all will not inspire a positive response. Really. It won't. I promise.

Do yourselves - and everyone else - a favor: use a little common sense. And, if necessary, have the photos done in black & white.